Meet Dr. Sandra Scantling
Dr. Sandy is an Associate Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at the University of Connecticut School of Medicine, a Licensed Clinical Psychologist, and a Master’s-prepared Psychiatric Nurse Specialist. A nationally recognized intimacy and relationship expert and author, she is also an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist and Diplomate in private practice in Farmington, Connecticut.
For more than 35 years, Dr. Sandy has helped individuals and couples better understand themselves, their relationships, and the patterns that can keep them from feeling connected and fulfilled. Her approach is integrative and highly individualized, drawing from Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy, Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), psychodynamic thinking, and mind-body perspectives. She does not believe in a one-size-fits-all approach to therapy.
Dr. Sandy holds degrees from Boston University, Indiana University, and Antioch University. She completed a doctoral fellowship at Yale University, followed by three years of advanced NIMH-supported training in sex therapy at Yale under Drs. Phil and Lorna Sarrel, who trained with Masters and Johnson.
She is the recipient of the Connecticut Psychological Association’s award for “Distinguished Contribution to the Science of Psychology” and has also been honored as “Sexuality Educator of the Year.”
Dr. Sandy is the author of Extraordinary Sex Now: A Couple’s Guide to Intimacy, co-author of Ordinary Women, Extraordinary Sex, and creator of the highly successful video series Ordinary Couples, Extraordinary Sex, which has sold more than a million copies worldwide. Her books have been translated into several languages, including Japanese, Italian, and German. She is also a contributor to The Most Important Thing I Know About…, a series exploring love, family, friendship, faith, and kindness.
Throughout her career, Dr. Sandy has been widely quoted in national and regional publications on intimacy, sexuality, and relationships. For four years, she wrote the twice-monthly Sunday “Intimacy, Sex, and Relationship” column for the Hartford Courant and has also written extensively for The Connecticut Psychologist.
Her television and radio appearances include The TODAY Show, Good Morning America, The View, CBS This Morning, the BBC, Fox television, and numerous other programs. She also appeared in a weekly Fox 61 WTIC segment addressing sexual health and relationship topics.
Dr. Sandy has lectured at universities and professional organizations and has spoken at educational and private events throughout the country.
Lasting change Begins with curiosity."
Understanding Creates Freedom of Choice.
Together, we’ll make sense of the patterns that have shaped your lives and create new possibilities for lasting change. My goal is to create a space where you feel safe enough to be fully yourselves…not because you’re being evaluated, but because you’re being understood.
Healing isn’t about getting everything right. Lasting change begins with self-awareness, compassion, and the willingness to take one thoughtful step at a time.
Meaningful change happens through collaboration. Together, we’ll explore your experiences with curiosity, build on your strengths, and work toward goals that feel authentic to you.
As you gain insight into the patterns that shape your thoughts, emotions, and relationships, new possibilities begin to emerge. Understanding creates the freedom to choose a different path.
Labels can describe experiences, but they do not define who you are. Therapy focuses on the whole person – your strengths, resilience, relationships, and capacity for growth.
Every reaction has a story. By exploring emotions and behaviors with curiosity instead of judgment, we can better understand what they are trying to communicate and create lasting change.
Curiosity is the Entry Point.
The Curiosity Loop represents the philosophy that guides my work with individuals and couples.
The Scantling Curiosity Loopᵀᴹ
A place where you can bring every part of yourself.
Whether your concerns are individual or relationship-related, Dr. Sandy is here to help …a place where you can bring every part of yourself without fear of shame, blame, or judgment.
You don’t have to arrive in therapy knowing exactly what’s wrong – or even knowing what needs to change. You can bring the uncertainty, the contradictions, the parts of yourself you understand and the parts you don’t. Together, we can become curious about what has shaped you, what keeps you stuck, and what might help you move forward.
Dr. Scantling specializes in treating anxiety, depression, past trauma, sexual concerns, marital and premarital issues, infidelity, divorce, and separation in traditional and non-traditional relationships. She understands that making the first call to a therapist can be challenging and is committed to helping each client feel comfortable in a compassionate, supportive, and non-judgmental environment.
TESTIMONIALS
Frequently Asked Questions
People come to therapy for many reasons—from feeling stuck or overwhelmed to wanting greater understanding, stronger relationships, better sexual connections, or other meaningful change.
You can expect a thoughtful, collaborative, non-shaming and non-blaming process, focused on understanding what is happening and what may help.
We begin with a conversation about what brings you in, what you hope will change individually or in your relationship, and whether working together feels like a good fit.
You don’t need to know in advance – the first few conversations can help you decide whether therapy feels useful and right for you.
Yes, I offer both in-person and secure virtual appointments, depending on your needs and circumstances.